The Birth of a Blog

I’m not starting this blog because of a New Year’s resolution, which is good because most of mine don’t live much past the month of January.  And it’s not the product of some epic brainchild or epiphany – years of being a stay-at-home mom have dulled my ambition to ponder ideas too grandiose in nature.  In fact, after thirteen years of parenting, my only dream of grandeur is finding a single moment of blissful silence where I don’t have to listen to my children fighting or hear myself repeating the same phrases over and over again like a demented parrot.

This blog is strictly a means of quieting the voices in my head, or at the very least pacifying them.  Not the kind of voices that will get you put on medication or committed to an insane asylum, but the kind that just won’t shut the hell up about life’s little observations, experiences, or pet peeves.  Every time something happens that evokes an emotional reaction, good or bad, my brain begins to mentally write lines of descriptive prose as if that one thought will be the start of the great American novel.  Often times, whatever kicked my brain into typewriter mode will wear itself out in a paragraph or two, and since there’s no such thing as the great American paragraph, my thoughts have often gone unwritten….until now.

After making two separate attempts to write a novel, I realized a couple things about myself.  First, I have the attention span of a squirrel.  So, anything that can’t be accomplished within an afternoon will often be put on my future ‘to do’ list… which is where most of my good ideas and intentions go to die.  Secondly, I have commitment issues.  I can stay married to the same man for over fifteen years, but apparently I can’t stick with the same idea for more than a month.  How can my heart be so devoted and my brain be such a slut?   It wants to jump around from idea to idea like it’s residing in the mental equivalent of the red light district. Thank God there’s no such thing as MTDs (mentally transmitted diseases), otherwise my brain would be a veritable Petri dish of infections.  Perhaps I took that metaphor one step too far….

So, what can you expect to find in my future blog entries?  Little snippets and observations that will hopefully entertain you for the ten to fifteen minutes it takes to read it… if you can’t devote that kind of time to me, I understand, my fellow squirrel.  But if you can, I will make you a couple of promises:

I will not use this blog as a forum to ramble on about my entire life story, mostly because of the aforementioned commitment issues, but also because it would potentially bore you into a coma (and coma patients don’t make for a solid foundation on which to build a successful blog).  Besides, my life simply isn’t tragic or inspirational enough to write about in its entirety.  Readers either want to hear life stories about how some poor girl spent her entire childhood forced to live inside a shoebox or about how the lower half of some guy’s body was eaten away by piranhas, but (after a short stint in physical therapy) he managed to run the New York City marathon.  Train wrecks or triumphs, right?  The same compulsion that makes us want to read those kinds of stories is the same one that makes us rubberneck at roadside accidents and cheer on the sidelines for the athletic underdogs.  It’s an inexplicable part of the human condition – we love drama.  We feast on it… kind of like the piranha on the lower half of that guy’s body.  But I stopped being a drama queen sometime after high school, and without the fuel of hormone-induced rage that my tumultuous teen years provided, I seem to have lost my flair for the dramatic.  So, I’ll save the drama for the pros, like Oprah and the Kardashians.

The other promise I will make you is that I won’t preach about religion or politics – not because I don’t care about those issues… well, yeah actually it is because I don’t care….but more because I don’t presume to hold enough influence to sway anyone on those issues one way or the other.  Either you believe the same things I do, or you’re wrong, no further discussion necessary.

So, sit down with me before you have to fight the road-ragers during your morning commute, or in that moment you’re debating whether or not to strangle one of your kids, and I’ll see if I can talk you out of committing homicide.  Because that’s what I’m all about here at Get Write Down To It –  saving lives, one blog entry at a time.

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30 thoughts on “The Birth of a Blog

  1. Great start to what I know will be a realistic, and humorous look at everyday life. I can’t wait to read what you write next.

    Congratulations on starting your blog. 🙂

    • KO- Thanks, random stranger who I’m definitely NOT married to 🙂 I hope you continue to follow my blog posts…. and if you’ve got some extra time on your hands, would you mind cleaning the bathroom?

    • Moe –

      WOW – I’m a bookmark!! How cool is that?! You’ve followed my writing since the days when we still put pen to paper, and it means a lot to me that you’re here to follow me into my blogging years. Speaking of which, it’s been awhile since I heard anything about your colon…. time for another update?

  2. You are truly nuts. Although, why wouldn’t you be? You are a family member.
    Keep it coming crazy cousin 🙂 What a hoot!

    • Kat – I ‘intrigue’ you? Like in a weird science experiment kind of way? Or like a problem that you just can’t quite figure out? Either way I guess I’ll take it as a compliment… better than boring the crap out of you.

    • Thanks, Aunt Sandy! I know you were among those that said I needed to go public with my writing – but I also know you’re a bit biased 🙂 But it’s my fervent wish that total strangers will appreciate my writing just as much as you always have.

  3. Linda, really enjoyed reading this and wish you lots of luck!! As I was reading, I thought to myself, “this is me 20 years ago.” The good news for me is that it’s great to know there is someone out there that really knows me. The good news for you is that you now know someone that HAS SURVIVED.

    • Dear pupperoni56 – you have the distinguished honor of being the first person to post a comment on my blog who I have no emotional or genetic ties to. I feel like you should win a prize… sturdy piece of tupperware… or a shoehorn or something….

      Your feedback means the world to me – both because you didn’t “have” to post it, and also because it gives me hope that someone made it to the other side and lived to tell the tale.

  4. Linda, congrats on the start of your blog. I look forward to following your blog well for several reasons….you always amuse me with your Facebook comments, your humor…hilarious, your writing…superb, your experiences as a mom….priceless. look forward to hearing the next!!!!!

  5. Blogging Rule #1: Never let 24 hours go without making an entry! How about sharing a heart-warming anecdote about what your childhood was like growing up with that witty, charming brother of yours?

    • Dear anonymous guy – For the last decade, my brain’s main source of stimulation came from watching Spongebob Squarepants with my two children. I fear that attempting to write a blog entry everyday would result stimulation overload… and probably a brain aneurism.

      As for writing about my childhood, I already made my readers a promise not to bore them with my life story. But should I ever change my mind and write about a choice snippet or two, perhaps one will include how my REAL brother used to annoy his sisters so much that one of them finally snapped and stabbed him with a fork.

      • I’m sure if your brother was annoying, it was for a reason (to make you stronger, or to teach you how to overcome adversity, or something like that)…
        But what do I know? I’m just some anonymous guy who definitely does NOT have the scars of four little puncture wounds in his left shoulder…

        • ok, I am just another random, anonymous woman who is definitely not related to either one of you.. but I just had to mention that anonymous guy has the WRONG SISTER in mind with the fork incident.. I’m just sayin

    • Naeem – Thanks for reading my very first blog entry! I love it when people go back and read/comment on my older posts… well, they’re not THAT old…. I’ve only been on here for two months 🙂

      As for my recent blog growth spurt, all I can say is WOW. It’s been amazing. For the first week since I began this blog, I didn’t have to bombard my friends and family with my blog post and BEG them to read it and leave feedback. By scoring a spot in “Freshly Pressed”, WordPress solved my problem about how I was going to find a way to expand my audience beyond my immediate friends and family. I went from a “following” of 12 people (lol), to almost 200 – AMAZING! If there is a cloud higher than nine, I’m on it 😀

  6. I haven’t been “Freshly Pressed” YET, but my day is coming. My blog is a little over 2 months old as well. I try my best to focus on writing good entertaining content first, and the recognition will come if it comes.

    12 to 200 followers is astounding! Congrats…and keep up the good work.

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